Ever notice that smartphones are great for masking social anxiety? Anytime we have a moment of feeling weird or bored or lonely it seems we pick up our phone and hide in it. It’s so very acceptable everywhere (well at least common, if not acceptable). I’m guilty of this. I was waiting outside a building for a friend. I tried to fight my uncomfortable everyone-must-be-looking-at-the-girl-with-no-friends feeling and just study people walking by or pretend great interest in traffic. But if I wait too long, I confess I pull out my phone too, even though I know there is nothing new there for me to see. There. I’m no longer awkward; I’m like everyone else. No reason to be looking over here. In fact, I'm invisible.
The cell phone is just the latest thing we’ll do to relieve anxiety. We need a distraction it seems, from our own minds. Some people smoke or snack… why is it so hard to just ‘be’… or more specifically, be a little uncomfortable? Should we actually be inuring ourselves to the discomfort? Would getting more used to it provide some benefit? We need to develop resilience and courage and confidence and a lot of other things that come from looking at our feelings and thinking about them. Feelings of discomfort pass, most of the time, without consequence. On the other hand, why torture ourselves with discomfort when we don’t have to? It’s a quandary.
The cell phone is just the latest thing we’ll do to relieve anxiety. We need a distraction it seems, from our own minds. Some people smoke or snack… why is it so hard to just ‘be’… or more specifically, be a little uncomfortable? Should we actually be inuring ourselves to the discomfort? Would getting more used to it provide some benefit? We need to develop resilience and courage and confidence and a lot of other things that come from looking at our feelings and thinking about them. Feelings of discomfort pass, most of the time, without consequence. On the other hand, why torture ourselves with discomfort when we don’t have to? It’s a quandary.